Earlier this week I attended a two-day online summit called "Practicing in the Midst" and I would say that if I could summarize my take away from the two days of live guests, discussions, and embodiment practices it is this: being and meeting all of myself. Moving from the Head to the Heart to the Belly with radical compassion in order to truly learn what it means to be with the black light of creation. I realize that this might be a bunch of jargon to you that probably doesn't make any sense, so I am going to do my best to try and explain.
Aisha Salem calls it the "black light of the ground, the black light in the belly, the feminine source" - the source of creation - it's about harnessing my relationship with the creative force of the Universe. I've recorded a video here, but I am also trying to break it down below in words below.
For the first 30+ years of my life, I was living out of my head. Constantly analyzing the world around me, not connected to my heart. I had moments of it, moments of authentic connection but I didn't live from that space. Then I moved into living from the heart.
Now? Now it's about true embodiment and moving into "the belly" which involves purification and cleansing. I tend to think of it as grounding everything that I have been experiencing for the last two years into my body. So, Instead of going up and out, which is what I have previously been doing through my meditative practices, it's about going down and in. So what exactly does that mean? Two things.
1. It means that I am learning to live in my here and now, not project myself into the future reality where I am an ascended master/enlightened being but truly be present with what's going on with me right now, in this moment
2. I'm learning to really love and embrace all of who I am. I say that all the time, but it means being with my "darkness" and learning that what it means to be whole to me, is an authentic acceptance that my "sadness" is just as divine as my joy. What this looks like is me owning my anger, owning my heartbreak, owning my fear, owning my anxiety. Admitting that I am actually angry and heartbroken, I haven't made peace with uncertainty yet and the "ungrounding" that I feel. I haven't made peace that I am still working on coming "home." I have moments were I am feeling grounded, but I also have moments where I'm feeling exhausted and sad. By truly being with my feelings and owning them, it's allowing me to learn to love them. It sounds a little strange to say that I'm learning to "love my heartbreak" or that I'm learning to "love my anger." But it's true. By doing that, I can come to be with it, to hold it, to heal, to transform, to transmute. And when I do that, I then create the space to allow for others to own their anger, their heartbreak, and their grief.
So what's my point here? I have experienced so many shifts in my own level of consciousness within the last few weeks but I am finally grasping the higher perspective of it all. The heartbreak that I am still moving through, the massive heart opening that I currently feel and that I am truly learning to be present and stay open to (even though part of me is terrified and wants to run far far away) and the embrace my uncomfortable emotions, is all about dropping from the "heart to the belly," it's about being with the dark light of creation, owning my own "dark light," accepting what it feels like to live in the uncertainty and unknown so that way I can also create the space for what wants to emerge.
Podcast is Below