It feels like I have been repeating some of the same patterns and life lessons over and over again recently.
I'll feel great, amazing even, and then something will happen that will cause me doubt/question/un-necessarily stress myself out.
This has happened in my work, academic and personal life repeatedly in the last few months
So the question I have been asking myself is why? Why do I feel like I am living out groundhog day?
The answer? I don't freaking know yet. But I do know that I am willing to take the mask off, dive in and try and figure it all out.
But first - Items I have Learned today:
Pancake Day: Back at home we had fat Tuesday, over here? Pancake Day. The British get ready for lent by stuffing their faces with pancakes
Gutted: Really upset about something "I was gutted that..."
Dogs Bollocks: Something that's really good and exciting (exactly what you think of right?? :)
I still seem to love to stress myself out.
But right now it's in the context of my job.
I am currently managing a pretty big job at work that could have a lot of implications if it doesn't go well.
I love Project Management, and I am actually really good at it.
But I've noticed recently, when something doesn't go to plan or work out the way in which I envisioned it (which is a very natural part of life), I am the first to stress out and think everything has gone of the tracks. Part of this is why I am good at my job, because I will stop at nothing to try and course correct and get everything moving foward again. The only issue is, I really do a great job of stressing myself out in the process.
When I am course correcting and getting things back on track, I realise it's quite hard for me to remember everything that has already been accomplished. I am so focused on fixing what is going wrong that I forget about everything that has previously gone right.
Another thing that I need to try and understand.
Why is it so hard for me to remember the positives, especically when I'm going through the thick of it?
When I do take that time to breathe and slow down, I realise just how much has already been accomplished. It helps to put the obtacle in perspective and lets me see that even though I might be right in the middle of it, I will work through it, we will get there in the end, and be so much better because of it.
So how does this tie into Vulnerability? Because I have recently realised the power in sharing it with all of you. For years now I have felt like I needed to go through things on my own, that exposing my struggles or asking for help is a weakness, what I am realising now is the strength and beauty in it all.
For further investigation of this, I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Brene Brown.
I'm convinced she is one of future BFF's.